I dislike holidays. They make me miss people and feel very, very alone.
I miss him... So much so that I can't even put it into words. After the way he's treated me he doesn't deserve devotion or these feelings... But they are there. I want to go home and hold his hand and kiss his lips. I feel as though I'm doomed to miss him forever.
If I focus on the positive, I've connected with an old friend. I missed his flirty, nerdy, wonderful sense of humor a great deal. It's been a very long time since the last time I laughed and smiled so often. Reminding yourself that he treats all women the same way is how you avoid his charm. You aren't special, just another number. :) He is a wonderful friend though.
Hopefully I'll make it through this weekend without too many tears. Fingers crossed.
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